Redemption
by GoldSilver02
Summary: She stares. He stares. It starts as a game. Neither are prepared for what would come of it. Sometimes, redemption comes in the form of words, softly spoken but always there.
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer**__: I own nothing. This saddens me greatly._

_**Pairing**__: Loki/Darcy, Thor/Jane, others mentioned_

_**Summary**__: She stares. He stares. It starts as a game. Neither was prepared for what would come of it. Sometimes, redemption comes in the form of words, softly spoken but always there. _

_**Author's note**__: Second Thor fic! Let me know what you think! Reviews are greatly appreciated!_

* * *

><p><strong>Redemption <strong>

**i. **

* * *

><p>He's one of those guys you feel bad for but really shouldn't. She's been around a lot of those guys. The guys with daddy andor mommy issues who decide to take it out on the people around them (or you know, in his case, the world). Yeah. Those guys who think that they don't have to obey any rules (mother fucker, _I_ make the rules). Still, she doesn't look at him and think "OMG. This is the guy who tried to make us all his bitches." (Which is technically true, but whatever). She doesn't look at him and hate him on spot (Hey Avengers, so, he tried to kill you all and almost succeeded but aren't you supposed to be the good guys?) She doesn't look at him with curiosity that borderlines disgust (Jane, we need to work on being subtle).

No. When Darcy looks at him she feels bad for him. She doesn't sympathize; she doesn't feel like he'd appreciate sympathy (probably wouldn't even let her get the chance of sympathizing before he'd kill her, isn't that what all super villains do?).

Instead, during her spare time, she goes down to the basement, down the hall painted white and walks into the fifth room on the left. It's a small room with a one-way mirror, the same mirror that she always sees on all the cop shows she watches (which amounts to a lot) and she stands, sometimes against the wall, sometimes leaning forward until her head touches the cool glass and sometimes with her arms crossed underneath her breast.

She stands and she stares and she _waits_. She doesn't know what she's waiting for. Maybe for some sign of remorse (he shows none). Maybe for a soliloquy of another world domination (he says nothing). Instead, she just stares at him. Stares at his black hair. At his green eyes (she's always been a sucker for green eyed men). At his face (it's so defined, almost like it's sculpted out of marble). She stares until she starts going cross-eyed. She stares until its time for her to stop.

But she'll always find herself turning back to stare at him one last time, as if terrified that he's just a figment of her imagination.

* * *

><p>"It just…it kills me. He's his brother and he's trying to do everything in his power to help him but Loki…he just doesn't want anyone's help." Jane tells her the next day. She's talking about Thor (she always talks about Thor) and his complicated relationship with Loki. Jane, of course, sides with Thor. She has to side with Thor. Darcy would be worried if she didn't, but still…part of Darcy wants to scream.<p>

_Of course he doesn't want Thor's help_. As far as Darcy knows (and Darcy is on a need-to-know, which _basically_ means she knows nothing except for second-hand gossip from Jane, basis) Thor is the reason that Loki flipped his shit and decided to take over the world and make them all his minions. Well…Thor and their father, who oddly reminds her of her Uncle Will. Darcy _hates_ her Uncle Will. So, is Darcy surprised that he doesn't want anyone's help? No. Is she surprised that he won't talk to anyone? No.

(Does anyone listen to Darcy and her opinions? No).

Fuck, if Darcy was brought into some strange ass facility and chained to a fucking table for all hours of the day, Darcy would refuse to talk to anyone too.

This is of course why Darcy and Jane are surprised when Coulson enters their office. Jane stands up straight, her back rigid and Darcy just turns in her chair and looks at him, dark hair falling in her face and body slouching (she has such bad posture. She blames her boobs).

"Miss Lewis." Coulson says, his eyes peering at her, "come with me."

"Where?" Darcy and Jane ask immediately.

Coulson shakes his head and gestures to the door. "Miss Lewis, that was not a request and Miss Foster, I expect your findings on my desk before you leave."

Darcy shrugs and gets out of her chair, "Sheesh, Phil, if this is just a ploy to feel me up, you are going to be in big trouble buddy."

He hates it when she calls him Phil and she knows it but she does it anyway.

They get into the elevator and she watches as he presses the _B_ button and she feels her heart lodge in her throat. She doesn't say anything, finds she can't. She hasn't done anything wrong, has she? She probably has but she has a S.H.I.E.L.D. personnel card which basically allows her everywhere in the fucking building. "Is this where you take all your lower level employees when you want to get rid of them?" She asks jokingly with a smile. _That's right, play dumb. Everyone feels sorry for dumb girls. _

He says nothing and she bites her tongue. She knows a few self-defense moves if anyone were to suddenly grab her. She doesn't have her taser with her (damn it!) but she once had a boyfriend who trains UFC fighters and his turn on was to get physical (the sex came _after_ the fighting). She picked up some good moves (a few bruises but he kissed them better). Sadly, they split up but she still keeps in contact with him.

As soon as they hit the basement, Darcy follows Coulson as he walks down the familiar hallway and through a very familiar door. Thor is in the room, his shoulders tense. He takes up half the room, God, the man is huge. How does he not suffocate poor little Jane when they screw like rabbits?

Fury is also there, arms crossed and looking well…furious. His head snaps towards her and Coulson when they walk in and he growls. Nicholas Fury actually growls at her. _What. The. Fuck_? Thor's expression melts just a little bit and he gives her a half grin, eyes shining with hope.

She grins shakily and waves, "so, if I knew we were going to have a powwow, I would have brought my pompoms."

"You are more trouble than you're worth." Fury says to her.

She blinks. "Oh. I know that. My dad says it all the time, but he says it in a joking _I love you and would never trade you for anything _kind of way. I'm guessing you don't mean it like that?"

Fury ignores her and points to the man chained to the table in the other room. "Do you know how long we've been working at him? Do you know how many agents tried getting him to talk? We've yelled, we've shouted, we've threatened. We've sent in Thor and he _still_ wouldn't say a goddamn thing."

Darcy won't lie. She's kind of frightened because she's pretty sure Fury has steam coming out of his ears. She'd laugh if she were pretty sure he wouldn't_ shoot_ her.

"And then he speaks. He opens his mouth and words come out!" Wait, hold up, Loki…spoke? Like with vowels and syllables and everything? And she missed it? _Damn_. "…for you!"

She blinks. "Wait, what?"

Thor moves to stand in front of her. "My brother would like to speak to you."

"Why?" She asks desperately. There's something clawing at her insides. She doesn't know what it is; all that she knows is that it's an emotion that's threatening to consume her if she doesn't get hold of it soon.

"I do not know." Thor answers truthfully, "I was in the room with him when he looked me straight in the eyes and said _I wish to speak to the brunette who always stares at me_. We were not aware of who he was referring to until he mentioned…well…you're…generous." Thor flails for words and lowers his eyes to her chest.

She can't help it. She busts out laughing. "Oh man. Dude, seriously? He described me as the girl with the big tits?" Well, she has been called worse.

"This is not a laughing matter, Miss Lewis." Fury tells her.

She stops laughing and bites her lip. She turns to Coulson and shrugs. "Right, okay."

"He is not like everyone else, Miss Lewis." Coulson tells her as he opens the door to let her out of the room. "Be careful and we'll be watching."

_Well, now that's part of the problem isn't it? Everyone's always watching. Just waiting for the wrong move they all know we'll make_. It's kind of sad when she thinks about it.

How everyone is just waiting for failure.

* * *

><p>She walks into the room and she's taken aback by how cold it is. She shivers, pulls her cardigan tightly around her and sits down on the empty chair across from him. His hands are chained but Darcy knows they're practically toys to him. He's Loki-God of Mischief and Lies- he can get out of everything, which makes her wonder why he hasn't disappeared yet. Why hasn't he escaped?<p>

She takes a deep breath and lifts her head (to this point she hasn't once made eye contact with him, she's looked everywhere but at the man in front of her), she jolts when she sees his green eyes staring at her. He looks at her curiously, his head tilting to each side. Studying her. Staring at her. As if trying to memorize her.

It's a little unnerving.

"So…you rang?" She jokes. She always jokes when she's nervous. Or she busts into tears. She thinks jokes may be better in this case. He doesn't answer, just keeps staring. So, she keeps talking. She talks about the shows she's watching, she talks about Central Park and how she likes walking there. She talks about her shitty apartment and that rude woman who ran into her and had the audacity to yell at her.

He still says nothing.

And Darcy snaps. "Okay, dude, you know what? _You_ called _me_. You wanted me to be here and now I am, so you wanna play the staring game? Fine. I'm down. I'll kick your sulking self all the way back to Ass-grab or wherever the fuck you're from."

"Asgard." Loki says. His voice is smooth, like velvet. "And I assure you, I would not be welcomed back."

He says it with certainty, his voice so sure, even bordering confident.

And Darcy can't help it, she really can't, she feels bad for him.

* * *

><p><em>Oh my. Another LokiDarcy fic. What am I doing with myself? To be honest, I have no idea where this is going to go. I have no idea what I'm doing with this story. I have a vague idea of how I want it to end up, but I want to know your guys' reaction. There will definitely be more conversation with Loki and Darcy and it'll probably be a little darker than my previous story. _

_So…please review, let me know what you think! I appreciate every review I get! _

_Thanks!_

_Bex_

_P.S. Any mistakes are mine and mine alone and I apologize if I offend anyone. _


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer**__: I own nothing. This saddens me greatly._

_**Pairing**__: Loki/Darcy, Thor/Jane, others mentioned_

_**Summary**__: She stares. He stares. It starts as a game. Neither was prepared for what would come of it. Sometimes, redemption comes in the form of words, softly spoken but always there. _

* * *

><p><strong>Redemption <strong>

**ii. **

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><p>"But why you?" Jane asks her.<p>

Darcy wants to hit her against the table but she refrains. As much as she loves Jane like the sister she never had, she's becoming irritated with the constant questions. She wouldn't mind if the questions varied but they don't. It's always the same question; _why you?_

The truth is, Darcy doesn't know why. She doesn't know why out of all the people in S.H.I.E.L.D., why out of all the people in the world, Loki chose her to talk to. Not that they talked much at all. She spoke. He said one sentence and then they lapsed back into silence. She could just imagine Fury getting angry, barking orders to get her out of the room, but no one came. No one walked in and escorted her out. She was left to stare at him.

Darcy has never been good with silence. She always has the urge to fill it with loud music, constant chattering, jokes, and lewd comments. Darcy has done them all and often within the same breath. But sitting in that room, across from a chained Loki, she found herself at a loss for words.

_There's something about him_, she thinks to herself,_ something so…defeated_. She thinks that's kind of crazy, stupid and maybe even a little misguided on her part. He's_ Loki_. He's a lot of things but defeated is probably not one of them.

Jane is silent before she opens her mouth, "how'd he look like?"

Darcy has her back turned to her boss, her head resting on her arms. _Lonely_. She thinks.

He looks lonely and her heart breaks for him.

(She's pretty sure that he'd laugh himself hoarse if he ever knew).

* * *

><p>"So, I've been researching you." She tells him the next time she sees him. She doesn't go into the other room anymore. She goes directly into his. The dark grey walls wrap around them, trapping them in this one room. All that remains between them is a table and Loki. Poor Loki chained to the table. She thinks there's probably some twisted joke she could make about the entire situation ("how's it feel to be chained, bitch?") but she values her own life, so she says nothing. Just that she's researched him.<p>

And she has. She spent the entire weekend glued to her laptop screen and various books at the public library (which, let's get real, she didn't even spend that much time in a library when she was in college). With every page, her horror grew. With every new fact and information, comprehension dawned. It was when she finally decided that she'd had enough with the horse fucking and children from Hell that she shut her laptop and closed the book on Norse mythology. She leaned against the chair in the library, hands clasped behind her head and breathed. It was all she could do in that moment because…_holyfuckingshit,_ _this_ is the guy that planned on obliterating them? _This_ is the guy who wanted to enslave them all.

She thinks she should be terrified (she kind of is) but there is an even bigger part of her that wants to scream for him. She wants to weep for him because, well, he did kind of get the short end of the stick. Seriously, an abomination amongst what he thought was his own people and not knowing how to deal with all this emotional shit churning inside of him, of course he would flip out. Right? Or is she reading into this too much? She probably is.

(She probably isn't).

(Still, she doesn't care how shitty he feels, he had no right. No right to destroy this world, _her_ world. She still has nightmares, not that she'd tell anyone, because her demons are her own).

He lifts his eyebrow, apparently amused. "Ah, yes. Mortal literature about Gods. About _me._ Tell me, was it interesting?"

"Sure. In a _holy-shit-you're-the-one-who-almost-killed-us-all_ type of way. Your childhood must have sucked ass." Somewhere behind the mirror, in the other room, Nicholas Fury is probably barking orders to get her the_ fuck out of there_.

"Do not presume to know anything about me." He says coldly. And _whoa, hey there Antarctica, how have you been? _

She frowns, "It's hard not to. You're on everyone's mind. You've killed people. People, _innocent people_, are dead because of you." _Shut-up Darcy. Shut the fuck up. Like now_. "So, you're adopted. So, you're apparently a Frost Giant or whatever they're called, that still doesn't give you any right."

"I have every right." He says this calmly but there is a hint of danger lurking beneath his voice and Darcy is too far gone to even notice. Later on, she'll think back to this exact moment and think that this was her chance. This was Loki giving her time to shut the fuck up and _get out_. Except Darcy doesn't listen. Darcy never listens. (This will prove to be devastating to her later on).

"No. You don't." She is adamant in her belief. "Look, I feel for you, it has to suck being lied to-"

"I don't need your pity!" He snarls.

She jolts back but glares defiantly. His body is giving off a cold chill and she knows that she should leave, she knows that she should bust out into tears but she can't because that's not who she is. She doesn't back down. She doesn't give up. "Too bad." She snaps back, she gets up, plants her hands palm down on the table and leans forward. "This is what we humans do. We _feel_ for people. We cry, we laugh, we smile, we hate, we live, we breathe, we _love._ We listen to our emotions; it's not the other way around. So, you've had a shitty childhood. Yeah, it must have been so horrible growing up in a castle made of gold and being a prince. It must have been so hard to get everything you ever wanted without lifting a _goddamn fucking_ finger. Get the fuck over yourself. You want tortured existence? Look outside. Look at we have to endure. You've killed family members. So, congratulate yourself because you've definitely made people miserable."

She takes a deep breath, her entire body shaking as she looks at him. "You're nothing but a failed dictator. You're no better than…than…Hitler."

By this time, three guards burst through the doors, weapons drawn and one of them whirls Darcy around and tries to usher her out the door.

"Hitler?"

And she falls limp. She shouldn't feel bad for him, she really shouldn't but she does. Because he has no idea about their world. He has no idea about their struggles. He's just a lost spoiled prince who spiraled out of control and took it out on the nearest victim (or in this case, planet).

* * *

><p>She's ushered into the room and Fury rips her a new one like she knew he would. He roars that she's stupid and <em>what the hell are you thinking?<em> She blocks him out, her head is pounding, her heart is pounding, her blood is boiling. She's losing control (a dark whisper in the darkest part of her mind tells her that she's just like him, waiting for the right moment to snap, to jump into the dark abyss where nothing is certain). She glances at Thor whose face is pinched, eyes downcast.

He's disappointed. (With who? Loki? _Her_?) Her heart aches. She hates disappointing Thor because when Thor's sad, Jane's sad and when Jane's sad, Darcy's sad. (It's a sad twisted little game of dominos, they all go down).

She turns her body around to look at Loki. He's still sitting in the chair, chained to the table. He turns his head to look at the mirror. In her peripheral vision, she can see Thor move forward and he puts his hands on the mirror. His hands are huge, as he presses against the mirror. She can feel the sadness exude from him and tears prick her eyes.

For a fraction of a second, she can see Loki's face soften and then it's impassive. But it's enough to mean something to Thor. He weeps. He weeps and says "sorry" over and over again, until it is the only thing Darcy hears in her head.

She stares at Loki, his green eyes piercing hers. She wonders what's going through his head. She wants to know his thought process. Does he know what's going occurring on the other side of the mirror? Can he see them? Can he see _her_? Can he see what he's doing to Thor? She wouldn't be surprised; didn't she read that he's a magician? A shifter?

"_I don't need your pity."_ He told her.

Well, no. Maybe he doesn't. But she's going to give it to him anyways.

* * *

><p>She doesn't sleep that night and she gets a <em>venti<em> black coffee from Starbucks the next morning. It's bitter and burns her throat on the way down, but she hardly cares.

Jane looks at her with wide eyes when she walks through the door. "Are you okay?" The older woman says quietly. "Thor told me what happened."

"I snapped." Darcy admitted. "I snapped and I couldn't help it because he's like those self-entitled little shit-heads I had to deal with at school and I seriously can't stand people with superiority complexes and I never meant to make Thor cry! Please don't be mad at me!"

Jane shakes her head. "I'm not mad. Why would I be mad? But I think you should stop going down to see him."

"I doubt I will." Darcy concedes, even though a dark whisper in the darkest part of her mind tells her that she'll go down regardless.

She doesn't know what to make of the dark whisper in the darkest part of her mind. It sounds like Loki and she knows that she should be terrified but she isn't.

(Why isn't she terrified?)

* * *

><p>Should it then come as a surprise to her when she finds herself in front of the door in the basement on her lunch break? It should but it doesn't. Instead, she balances the larger than life book in one hand and another coffee on top of it. She takes a deep breath and opens the door.<p>

He doesn't look surprised to see her. He looks up and says nothing as she places the book and coffee on the table and takes her seat. He says nothing as she gets comfortable and takes a sip of her coffee. She pushes the book in the middle of the table so that both he and she can look at it and she flips it open. "I bought this on a whim. It's a steal. It was only twenty bucks and I figured it would make me seem smart." She tells him.

"_The Complete History of the World_." Loki repeats the title and then cocks an eyebrow at her, as in, _what the fuck are you doing here_?

"You have no idea who Hitler is. That's kind of pathetic but it got me thinking, what _else_ don't you know? You tried destroying us and you know nothing about us." She takes a deep breath and steadies herself. "Look, you went through shit, I'm not denying that, but…so did we."

He leans forward, obviously interested. "Why did you come back?"

She stays silent. Why did she come back? Because she glutton for punishment? No. She doesn't think that's it. Because he haunts her every waking moment? Yeah, that sounds about right. Because she can't get him out of her head. He's like a cancer, something that goes beyond the surface and into the blood. Instead, she shrugs her shoulder, "because you asked for me."

She still doesn't know why he asked for her, all that she knows is that he did, and Darcy's too far-gone to come back.

(He's her domino. He's her catalyst. Now, she's just waiting for everything to go _boom_).

* * *

><p><em>So, I totally think that Loki is the act-first-think-later type of guy and it would make sense that he doesn't know anything about humans and their civilizations, just that he hates them and wants them destroyed. Right? Or is this me making excuses for him? You can tell me that I'm completely stupid and I've ruined everything. I won't mind. Actually, I will. My psyche is very fragile. :)<em>

_EEEEEPPP! You guys are awesome. Seriously, you guys are awesome and I can't thank you enough for your reviews. They mean a lot and I hope you enjoyed this chapter. There will probably be more fights between the two because they are just that explosive. Honestly, I think they'd be that couple, you know, the ones who are at each other's throat but will end up always defending one another. Hopefully this is good and not a complete waste of your time. _

_Also, The Complete History of the World is an amazing book. It's in its eighth edition now and it's fantastic. Although, the eighth edition goes for waaaaaaay more than twenty bucks. Try one hundred. Still, worth every single penny. Also, mythology stuff meet Wikipedia. I'm shit with Norse mythology. Roman, Greek, African…I rule. Norse? Meh, not so much. All I know is that I want to marry Tom Hiddelston. Because he's so awesome. Seriously…I squeal like a crazy fan girl every time I see him on television. Yikes! I'm going to stop talking! Lol. _

_HUGE THANKS TO MY REVIEWERS! __**dhauren, celia, ann, Imperial Dragon, LaLaShivers, Mushroomking98, Chuuulip, Selene Illusinia, Trini Li, Lady Draconian,**__ and __**BlindingFirefly**__. Honestly, your guys' support means the world. Also, major apologies if I miss anyone!  
><em>

_Any mistakes are mine and mine alone and I apologize if I offend anyone with them. _

_Thanks again!_

_Bex. _


	3. Chapter 3

_**Disclaimer**__: I own nothing. This saddens me greatly._

_**Pairing**__: Loki/Darcy, Thor/Jane, others mentioned_

_**Summary**__: She stares. He stares. It starts as a game. Neither was prepared for what would come of it. Sometimes, redemption comes in the form of words, softly spoken but always there. _

* * *

><p><strong>Redemption <strong>

**iii. **

* * *

><p>For the most part, Darcy likes Clint Barton. He's a nice guy with an okay sense of humor and he's not that bad to look at either. Except now, she can barely stand to look at him.<p>

"I'm just saying…why fill his head with more ideas?"

Darcy frowns. "Seriously. It's a _book_. And he's chained to a table every single day. I'm pretty sure he can use some sort of relief."

"Rumor has it, he almost killed you." There's worry in his voice and if Darcy weren't so irritated she would tease him about it.

"Blown out of proportion." She responds as taps her foot impatiently and waits for her coffee to finish. She smiles triumphantly when it's done brewing, grabs the cup and turns to walk away.

"Where are you going?" He asks her as he catches up to her.

"It's my break." She says, "I'm going to see Loki."

Clint frowns, "because there's _obviously_ nothing wrong with that statement."

She doesn't say anything. She_ knows_ that there's something wrong with her. Who would willingly go down to see Loki? (And no, Thor doesn't count). Except she can't help it. She has a compulsion to see him. She has this need to be near him, to listen to him talk or even to watch him stare.

(Darcy Lewis has never been addicted to anything in her short existence but she's starting to think that she's addicted to Loki).

* * *

><p>"I've read the book." He says to her as soon as she takes her seat.<p>

"Yeah, how'd you like it?"

"I stand by my original opinion. Humans are incorrigible."

She should be shocked. Somehow she's not. "You're narrow-minded."

"You said to me that you humans cry, laugh, smile, hate, live, breathe, love. All that I have seen is hate in this book. How many wars has humanity gone through? How many times do you all seem to repeat the same mistakes _allowing_ those mistakes to invoke war? How can you sit in front of me and tell me that I am wrong in wanting to enslave you all."

She frowns. "Because that's not how we work. Our free will has fucked us over more times than I like to admit but that's just it, it's_ our_ free will. You would have taken that away from us and we would be back at square one. Do you understand any of what I'm trying to tell you? This isn't about enslavement. This is about you admitting that at its core, humanity is good. Look at the Renaissance and peace movements and NATO and the Olympics."

"I am still right." He falls silent, "and I believe I take offense to you comparing me to Adolf Hitler."

Darcy scoffs and gestures to him. "Dude, from where I'm sitting, you're just as narrow-minded as him."

"No. You see he wanted to obliterate an entire _people_. I want to enslave_ everyone_. There is a difference and I am quite shocked you did not realize it."

"I think I would be laughing my ass off right now if that wasn't so completely twisted and you want to you know…kill me."

"I do not want to kill you." He says to her.

"Right. I'm sorry, enslave me."

(O_h, kinky images. Get them out now. Darcy! No sexing the enemy_).

He lifts his eyes to meet hers and he holds her stare.

(Fury will later storm out of the office she shares with Jane pissed that she won't tell him what the silent exchange was all about. But Darcy won't tell anyone that she knows, she doesn't know how she knows, just that she_ knows_, that if Loki ever does get the chance to enslave the human race, he'd let her have her free will).

* * *

><p>She starts seeing him in the shadows. When she walks to her apartment, she'll see him in her shadow, watching, staring. Memorizing her every movement. She starts imagining him everywhere. At the Laundromat, tucked into the corner, green eyes tracking her. She starts seeing him through every surface. She starts seeing him in her mirror. (And this, <em>this<em>, should terrify her, it should make her want to vomit that when she looks at herself in the mirror, all she sees is him. What does it mean? Is she losing her mind? Or is she suddenly just embracing it?)

At night, he creeps into her dreams. Sometimes they're exploring the world. Sometimes they talk. (She'll never remember the conversation when she wakes up, all she'll remember is his voice in her head, _always in her head_). Sometimes, they'll just stare at each other. Other times…other times, she'll be enveloped in darkness, hands caressing her, lips hovering over her, never kissing, always teasing, always exchanging breaths (he breathes in, she breathes out. It is a cycle). Those nights, she'll wake up, body flushed, throbbing and hands trembling.

But every once in a while, she'll dream about the end of the world. Everything is exploding, people are dying, people are screaming and she is standing across from Loki in the middle of all the chaos, all the wreckage, all the death. He'll outstretch his hand and she'll take it without hesitation and the moment their fingers are intertwined with each other, so that she doesn't know where she ends and he begins, the world erupts in a kaleidoscope of colors.

She'll wake up from those dreams gasping for air, body shaking and her hand cramped. As if she held on to something too tightly. She always wakes from that dream when the dawn is breaking and the sky is a brilliant shade of pink. (And a dark voice in the darkest part of her mind will whisper that she will be part of the end of the world and Darcy cannot find it in herself to dispute that fact).

She starts buying green things. Green shirts, a green dress, green underwear. She doesn't bother to try and process why she's buying these things in green. It's almost instinctual. Almost like she has to.

(He's her addiction and she's going down…down…down…the rabbit hole. _This is no Wonderland,_ Darcy thinks to herself, _it's more Atlantis, somehow there but never to be found_).

* * *

><p>When she walks into the room, Loki's face is neutral. It's always so fucking neutral and all she wants is to see him lose control. She wants him to go back to that first day that she met him, eyes blazing and body trembling with repressed power. (<em>This place is sucking him dry<em>, she thinks, _and isn't that so awful?_)

By now, Darcy knows that there is no one behind the glass mirror. They don't have any important conversations and Fury is sick of watching them look at each other. Thor is off on some Avenger business and the guards are worth shit. "You're haunting me." She tells him, her voice tired.

A small smile (it promises so much, _come with me, aid me_) plays on his lips. "So I am."

"Why?" She doesn't tell him to stop: _one_, because she doubts he'll listen and _two_, she _likes_ having him around her. She _likes_ knowing that he's always there, always watching.

"Because you, Darcy Lewis, are oh so very interesting."

It's the first time he says her name and she shivers with delight. (She wants him to repeat it over and over again until it's the only thing she can hear in her mind). "Why?"

He leans back in his chair, "why do you continue to see me?"

"Because I can't stop." She admits before she can help herself. "What are you doing to me?"

"I am doing nothing. Your mind, your body, _your free will_, is binding you to me."

"Why?" She is desperate, because there is so much swirling around her head and all she wants is _him_. All she wants is his voice in her head, smoothing all the demons away (and probably replacing them with his own).

He leans forward and closes the space between them. Suddenly, their faces are close to each other (so close) and all she think about is how much like déjà vu this is, with their breaths exchanging. He breathes in, she breathes out (it is a cycle). "Because you amuse me. Because I need you. Because the two of us can rule everything _together_."

_This is a trap. Get out. Darcy! Darcy! Look away! Stop!_ She doesn't listen because there is something pulling her forward. There is something taking her down deeper. And suddenly her lips are on his, tongues dancing for dominance (he wins. He always wins). She brings her hands up to cradle his face and she is lost…lost to the abyss, lost to the darkness. She closes her eyes and succumbs.

(A dark voice in the darkest part of her mind whispers that she will be his redemption. She knows now, with certainty why the voice sounds like Loki. It's because the voice _is_ Loki. He's in her mind. He's in her _soul_).

Everything explodes. Figuratively speaking of course. Although, she supposes everything will follow soon after.

* * *

><p><em>Kinda dark-ish right? Oh dear. What am I doing to myself? Well, I suppose that's what I get for listening to The Deer Tracks while writing this chapter. By the way, The Deer Tracks? Amazing. Awesome. They rock my world. So, I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and thanks so much for the reviews!<em>

_Also, those of you who are afraid that Darcy will become a sort of slave to Loki (oh the fun images, lol) fear not! I have a few things up my sleeve! Darcy will never lose her fire. I think Loki would never want her to. Damn it, why can't they be a real couple?_

_As always, shout-out to my awesome reviewers who make me squeal with happiness: __**dhauren, celia, Imperial Dragon, Trini Li, Mushroomking98, BlindingFirefly, Chuuulip, lepomme, Lady Draconian **__and __**BloodyTink**__. If I miss anyone I apologize! But thanks again for everyone who is reading and reviewing and everyone who put this on their faves and alert list. It makes me so happy that you are all enjoying this. _

_Any mistakes are mine and mine alone and I apologize if they offend anyone. _

_Thanks!_

_**Bex. **_


	4. Chapter 4

_**Disclaimer**__: I own nothing. This saddens me greatly._

_**Pairing**__: Loki/Darcy, Thor/Jane, others mentioned_

_**Summary**__: She stares. He stares. It starts as a game. Neither was prepared for what would come of it. Sometimes, redemption comes in the form of words, softly spoken but always there. _

_AN: Any mistakes are mine and mine alone and I apologize if they offend anyone!_

* * *

><p><strong>Redemption <strong>

**iv. **

* * *

><p>It comes as a surprise to her that she doesn't get fired the moment Fury sees her. Instead, he glowers and asks her why she still goes down to see Loki even if they don't talk. Darcy frowns but doesn't say anything. She's afraid to say anything in case she ends up making an ass out of herself and proving everyone else right.<p>

She doesn't have the right to be in S.H.I.E.L.D., she's an accident. She was in the right place, at the wrong time, with the right astrophysicist (this made sense in her head, actually, no it didn't. That's a lie).

So, she passes Jane, Thor, Clint and Steve. She passes Fury and Coulson and she makes her way down the elevator to the basement and down the familiar hall and into a familiar room where she'll stare at a familiar face. She'll wonder idly if this is how her future will end up, always coming back to this room, staring at the man (God) chained to the table with a neutral expression on his face. (She ignores the slight widening of his green eyes and she'll ignore the small, almost non-existent smile, because her heart will probably not be able to take it).

She takes her seat and folds her hands in front of her. "I had an interesting conversation with Fury this morning." She informs him, "Actually, it was mostly him talking and me staring at him with the occasional nod."

"And what was this conversation about?" He asks with an air of disinterest but Darcy already knows that he knows what she's going to say. And damn it, _how the hell does he do that?_

"He's under the influence that all we do is stare."

And then he smiles and it's a mischievous sort of smile that promises all sorts of secrets. "It's because that is all he sees. That is all any of them see."

"I'm confused." She says bluntly.

"Of course you are. What is happening between you and I, right now, is not for their viewing; they see what I want them to see. Staring. Some days when I am feeling more giving, I allow them to see trivial conversations. But right now, all they see is you and I, staring."

"How are you doing this?"

"Magic."

She swallows a lump in her throat, "I thought this room binds your powers."

He laughs. It's not a musical sort of laugh that she sometimes dreams about or imagines. It's a dark, bitter and twisted laugh. Where his smile is mischievous that promises endless secrets, his laugh promises revenge. "My powers cannot be bound, especially not by something as trivial as one room."

"Can't Thor feel you using your magic?"

"Thor is an imbecile." The words are dripping with pure venom and hatred and Darcy almost coils back.

"Then why haven't you escaped?" She wonders. "Why haven't you used your magic and left?" She has a feeling she knows what he's going to say and she hates herself just a little bit because of it. There is a queasy feeling in her stomach and she puts a hand on it, in some sort of attempt to soothe it.

"I was going to." He admits to her, "but then I saw you and I thought to myself, wouldn't you be just right."

_Oh God. _

"You are going to be my escape, Darcy Lewis."

Oh_. Oh, Darcy, what have you done?_

* * *

><p>She hightails it out of the room and races to the bathroom. She slams the stall door just in time to bend over and vomit in the toilet. The taste of bile and sour stench is enough for tears to sting her eyes. She empties the content of her stomach and falls next to the toilet. The tile is hard on her ass and she bangs her head against the stall wall, wondering how the hell she managed to get herself into this situation.<p>

_You are going to be my escape_, keeps repeating in her head like some bad song. She feels like exploding as she covers her hand over her mouth to muffle her cries. She's going to help him. She doesn't know how, fuck, she still doesn't even know _why_, but she knows that she's going to help him.

She'll kick and scream and probably fight against him but in the end she knows that she'll do it. She'll do it for _him_ and this sets her off all over again.

She's lost. She's lost to him and she doesn't know how to get out.

* * *

><p>"Would you do anything for Thor?" Darcy asks Jane when she comes back into the office. She's gurgled water and downed an entire bottle of tic tacs to mask the smell of vomit. She hopes it works. It did when she was younger and lied to her parents about drinking. She hopes the two are the same. They probably aren't.<p>

Jane doesn't hesitate to answer. "Yes. I would do anything he asks me to."

"Why?"

Jane puts down the pen in her hand and turns around to face her. She has a look on her face that Darcy has come to know as contemplation. "I…don't know. The scientific part of me is telling me that I shouldn't. That I should assess the situation before I do anything but I just…I know that if anything were to happen and if Thor needed my help in any way, I would help him. I would do it, no questions asked, because I love him. Because I can't imagine my life without him." She bites her lip and shakes her head. "That's really cliché isn't it? I would do anything because of a guy. As if the last hundred years of feminism and women's rights mean nothing, right?"

Darcy feels her throat go dry and she shakes her head. "No. No. I get it. You love him." She takes a deep breath. "But what if he asks you to do something that you're fundamentally against?"

"Darcy…are you okay?" Jane asks worriedly.

"This isn't about me!" She exclaims suddenly, her voice loud and she knows, she just knows that she's on the verge of sobbing…again. _Jesus Christ, Darcy, get a hold of yourself_. "Would you do something for Thor if you were against it?"

There is silence and Darcy has almost given up on Jane even answering and all she wants to do is crawl into a hole and cry and wait for everything to end. She wants to turn back time and she wishes that she never went down to the basement to begin with. She wishes that she wasn't so damn curious about Thor's evil brother and she wishes a whole lot of things that are obviously too late for her to take back.

(She wishes that she were in another world where Loki isn't evil and it wouldn't be wrong to like kissing him. But then she thinks about it and Loki in another world wouldn't be the real Loki would he? He wouldn't be_ her_ Loki. And _whoa! Hey there Darcy, when the fuck did he become your Loki?_ Jesus, she's so screwed).

"If Thor asked me to do it," Jane says her voice quiet, "then I would."

Darcy nods her head once and then turns away from Jane, unable to face her inquisitive eyes and compassion. One, two, three tears slide down her cheeks and Darcy knows she's in over her head.

(She's not a superhero. She isn't super smart. She has zero skills except her awesome taste in music. So, she keeps wondering what Loki sees in her. Because from where Darcy is sitting, she's just another mortal with big boobs and a bigger mouth).

* * *

><p>It's nearing the end of the day and she can hear the chattering of people, she can already feel Manhattan come alive with people walking up and down the streets, eager to get to their destinations. She's getting antsy, all she wants to do is go home and soak in a hot bath and possibly get drunk. As it stands, she still has a half hour and she's about to suggest to Jane that skip out early when the lights flicker. Darcy frowns and feels a tug at her stomach. She blinks and stares at Jane who lifts her head slowly and looks at her. "Dude, was that just me-" she stops in the middle of the sentence because the lights are completely shut off and darkness reigns.<p>

She stands up and looks outside the window and her shock grows as one by one, every single building in the greater New York area shuts down. The city is shrouded in darkness. Clouds of gray cover the sky in warning of something ominous and Darcy has a feeling she knows what's coming next.

"What's happening?" Jane asks.

No sooner are the words out of her mouth, an alarm starts going off. It wails loudly and blinks bright red. Darcy automatically covers her ears and bows her head. "Turn it off!" She shrieks, "make it stop!"

She can hear the thundering footsteps of people in the building and the loud voices of various employees. "What's happening?" Jane yells over the loud noise.

Darcy starts to answer that she doesn't have any idea (lie), maybe it's just a tripped wire (lie) and hopefully it'll go away soon (God Darcy, you're such a liar) but the look on Jane's face makes her stop. Jane pales quickly and her eyes widen with surprise.

Darcy feels him before she sees him. He's behind her and there's an arm wrapped around her waist, trapping her in place. "Ah, Miss Foster." Loki says pleasantly, "you are oddly plain to capture my brother's attention." He looks around nonchalantly, "your Avengers will be here in precisely twenty seconds and when they do arrive, I will be gone, as will Miss Lewis but this is not the last time you will see me. I will come back and finish what I started. It is fate, you see. You were all made to be ruled."

Through the shrill noise, she can hear Clint's loud exclamation "Let her go!" She hear the bullets that fly by her, she can hear Thor's thundering, heart wrenching yell, "LOKI!" but most of all, she can hear a loud manic laugh that promises revenge and chaos.

And death.

* * *

><p>She is wholly unimpressed when she is torn through what is supposedly time and place and saddled in a garden. A garden. Really? "That was your master plan?" She scoffs to cover the fact that she's shaking and terrified. "To kidnap me from my office?" She kicks at a patch of ground, "where the fuck are we anyway?"<p>

"Eden." Loki answers for her.

She blinks. "What?"

"Eden." He says slowly. "Or rather what Eden supposedly looks like. We are in a different plane of existence. They will not find us here."

"Why are we here?"

"So we can plan."

"_We _are not doing anything." She can feel the anger building in her chest. "You want me as a hostage, fine, you've got me. But I am not going to help you destroy anything. Especially not my world with my friends and my family and fuck-why are you smiling."

"Oh Darcy, you already are helping me and you do not even know it." There is a smug smile on his face and she has the sudden need to slap it off.

"I don't understand."

"You would not. You are mortal and therefore inferior."

"You know," Darcy grumbles as she sits down on the grass, "you're a psychotic asshole, has anyone told you that recently?"

"Not recently, no."

They sit in silence until Darcy can't take it anymore. "What are you planning?"

He looks at her and a shadow of a smile dances across his face, "I am planning the end of your world. It is going to be fantastic."

She blinks and then turns her eyes away from him. Well, she has to give him props for being honest at least.

* * *

><p><em>So, this is a filler chapter. Something that kind of needed to be done. Expect more DarcyLoki interaction in the next chapter. A few more blowups, a war of the wills if you please, because well, Darcy ain't going down without a fight, yo. There will be some twisted thought process on her part and the allusion to sex because I don't write smut. I'm horrible at it. Don't worry, Loki's plan for chaos will be featured in a couple chapters. Oh, Darcy, the ride I have her going through is not going to be pretty. Well, not for Loki either. I guess we'll just see. _

_So, my reviewers, you guys are awesome and I love you. Shout outs to: __**dhauren, Trini Li, Imperial Dragon, celia, chuuulip, k, I'm not ulyssess, Theresa Jane, ShimmeringWater, Scarletwitch0, EmCarstairs**__. If I missed anyone I apologize and thanks again. _

_Your support means a lot and I promise (hopefully) next chapter will be better._

_Thanks again!_

_Bex_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Disclaimer**__: I own nothing. This saddens me greatly._

_**Pairing**__: Loki/Darcy, Thor/Jane, others mentioned_

_**Summary**__: She stares. He stares. It starts as a game. Neither was prepared for what would come of it. Sometimes, redemption comes in the form of words, softly spoken but always there. _

_**AN**: Any mistakes are mine and mine alone and I apologize if they offend anyone!_

* * *

><p><strong>Redemption <strong>

**v. **

* * *

><p>She's lying on grass, hands fisted in dandelions as she's staring up at a light blue sky with the sun so bright, she winces when she looks directly at it. This Eden, this version of a hideout is strangely familiar to her and she doesn't know where she's seen this place before. She doesn't know why the familiarity is so strong it makes her double over sometimes.<p>

She's a prisoner in Eden and Darcy wants to laugh until she cries because she's never been particularly religious but she's _trapped_ in _Eden_. She's sure there's some joke in there and she's positive that her father would know it in a heartbeat.

_Oh_. There's a pang in her chest, a giant gaping hole in her heart when she thinks about her father. She thinks that he'd be disappointed in her. Tears sting her eyes and she idly wonders what S.H.I.E.L.D. has told him about her. Have they told him that she's aiding and abetting the God who wants to enslave the world? Have they told him that she's dead? That's she's missing? Did he cry? That's a stupid question. Darcy knows the answer to that. Her father would weep loud gut-wrenching sobs. She's the only one he has left but now she's gone and he's alone and Darcy has never hated Loki so much as in this moment. Right now. Laying in the sun, thinking about her father, makes her hate Loki.

(Mostly, she hates herself. But hating Loki sounds better).

* * *

><p>She ignores Loki. She doesn't want to see him because she's afraid that she won't be able to help herself. She's afraid of losing control and attacking, because she's so very liable to attack him. So, she keeps her distance. It's a large garden, filled with flowers and never ending sunshine and a pond where she sits and plays with the water, watching as it ripples, and this keeps her busy, it keeps her mind busy (and she falls into a pattern, a familiar pattern).<p>

She wonders what's happening back home. She's wondering about Jane and Thor and Clint and Steve and Coulson. Fuck, she's even thinking about Fury. She's certain that Fury's roaring with anger, saying that he knew it was a bad idea for her to go in that room that started everything.

(Darcy will never admit it to his face, but she should have listened to Fury).

But Darcy doesn't listen to anyone. She's never listened to anyone. It's a fact that her father understands, maybe even adores a little bit but Darcy won't forget the shit she put her parents through when she was younger. Before her mother got sick (during her mother's sickness), before her mother died (after her mother died). Before Darcy retreated into herself and- _oh. My. God_.

She starts breathing hard as she sits upright quickly enough to get dizzy. She scrambles off the ground and looks around. This is why this place is so familiar. This is why it is so very strangely familiar to her. She's been here before. Not_ here _in this exact garden, even Darcy knows that's impossible but just _here_.

She was a messed up little girl with a big imagination that her parents humored. She idolized her mother growing up and her mother was a horticulturist. She was a professional gardener (winning awards and everything, Darcy was always so proud of her mother) and Darcy's family had a garden in their back yard. It was huge and large and fucking breathtakingly beautiful, they even had a little pond in the middle of it and Darcy would lay and play with the water, watching as it rippled while her mother would read her stories about everything.

(Her mother mostly read Jane Austen. Where other girls grew up with Disney, Darcy grew up with Austen and Tennyson and Yeats).

Then her mother was diagnosed with breast cancer when Darcy was thirteen and she died when Darcy was sixteen and Darcy was a shitty and bratty teenager those last three years of her mother's life. When her mother died, Darcy pleaded and begged for a little more time, but time had run out. Time was gone, it slipped through her fingers and Darcy retreated into herself. She retreated back into the garden where everything seemed okay. She wasn't a horticulturist like her mother, instead she watched as the plants and flowers dried up and died (because everything around Darcy dies).

Her father moved them to Albuquerque, New Mexico. Far away from their home in California and far away from the garden. Then Darcy moved to Manhattan with S.H.I.E.L.D. and the garden was just a mere memory. A place where she would escape to in her dreams before Loki took over.

Her blood is boiling by the time she reaches him. He's sitting underneath a tree, legs crossed and eyes closed. He looks peaceful, more peaceful than Darcy has ever seen him but none of that matters. "You son of a bitch." She snarls. Her voice is hard and there is an emotion taking over her. It's dark and twisted and it's begging to be set free. It's begging to be unleashed.

He eyes fly open and they're hard as stone. "It would benefit you if you did not talk about my mother."

She lets out a laugh and its bitter (her whole entire body is seeping with bitterness). "Don't talk to me about mothers. You mind-fuck."

His face is impassive. "You will have to clarify yourself."

"My mind. My dreams. My_ memories_. What did you do?"

He looks confused for a second but then clarity reigns and he smiles. He _smiles_ and Darcy wants to yank her hair out. She wants to roar and cry but mostly she wants to hit him. She wants to _hurt_ him. "I thought you would appreciate a little familiarity."

Deep down she does. She appreciates it because it reminds her of when she was a little girl and her mother was still alive and reading her books. It takes her back to days in the sun and watching her mother smile and laugh and it takes her back to the time when she wasn't the only thing grounding her father to this empty life. She appreciates it a little bit but not enough to let Loki know that because this-_this_ is part of her life. This is part of her past. Part of her dreams and thoughts and if he knows about this, then what else does he know?

"You used your magic on me." It's not a question. It's more of a statement and her voice sounds hollow and confused and she's hurt and desperate and she wants to leave. She wants to leave and never come back. She wants to turn back time and redo everything. Why isn't there a rewind button?

"I use my magic on everyone."

"But you used it on _me_. And I don't even want to be here. I want to go back home. I want to talk with Jane and tease Thor and joke with Clint and make Steve blush and I want to fight with Fury and I want to see my father. I just…why won't you take me home?" She doesn't want to be here anymore. There are no walls, just open sky and she feels like she's suffocating. She's looking around and she knows that if she closes her eyes she'd be able to see her mother. She'd be able to flashback to all the conversations and books and hide-and-seek games played in their garden.

(But it's not real is it? Everything is weaved together perfectly by Loki. Everything is just made by magic and none of it is real).

"We cannot leave. We are not ready."

"I am!" She shrieks. "I never asked for this! I never wanted any of this. I just…I didn't want you to be lonely and I felt bad for you and I felt sympathy and I thought you could use a friend and _I_ wanted to be that friend but I never signed up for the end of the world. I don't want to be a part of this." She really doesn't want anything to do with this but there is a part of her that tells her she would end up in the same position even if she had the chance for a do over. That somehow, not matter what, she and Loki would cross paths and she would end up here and now and with him.

_Always with him._

* * *

><p>She ends up falling to ground, curling on her side facing him. "I hate you." She tells him. Even as she says it, she knows it's a lie. Fuck, why is she such a bad liar? "I don't understand how you can do this. I don't understand how you can be so pissed at your family and take it out on us. On me."<p>

"Do not speak of my family." He says in a frosty tone and his body gives of strange chills and Darcy shivers (maybe from the cold or maybe from the icy tone of his voice).

She shakes her head and sits up, crossing her legs. "Fuck you. You've ruined my family." And he has. He's torn apart the memory of her mother and attached it to this-to the end of the world. He's devastated Jane and Thor and everyone else at S.H.I.E.L.D. "You don't get to take my family away from me and not talk about yours."

"There is nothing to say."

"Bullshit. Your father is selfish and you're brother is the favored one and your mother sat on the sidelines while everything fell and shattered. Fuck, you're just like Will and Harry aren't you? The heir and the spare, how does it feel to know that you're-"

"_ENOUGH_!" He roars. The garden shudders, the ground shakes and leaves fall around them.

"You're nothing but an overgrown bully. You're fucking childish and no wonder your parents don't you back."

"I am warning you, mortal. I will-"

"You'll what?" She says, her voice calm. She's surprised that she's so calm. She's not even shaking. Does this mean that she's come to terms with everything? Does this mean that she's okay with goading an all-powerful God into a fit of anger? Probably, but she's long lost control of herself. "You'll_ kill _me? Go ahead. That's what you're going to end up doing anyways, why not just save yourself the time?"

She sees his shoulders fall and they stare at each other. (So, it's back to this. Staring). He says nothing as he sits down across from her. She doesn't break eye contact with him and she's surprised that she's not dead yet. Or maybe she is and doesn't know it. God, everything is so confusing.

"Do you have any idea what it is like to have everything you have ever known-ever believed in-ripped away from you?" His voice sounds…defeated and it makes her heart (her giant gaping heart) clench.

_Yes. No. Kind of_ is what runs through her mind but she thinks that it's a rhetorical question so she says nothing.

"It is a horrible feeling. It is all consuming. It makes you do things that were not in your nature before and suddenly, you find that you have embraced the monster that was in you all along." He takes in a deep breath and puts his hands on his knees. "Imagine everything you have ever known is now wrong and all you want to do is lash out. All you can remember are the taunts and ridicules and rejection in favor of someone else, someone so close to perfection it hurts. Everything else disappears, just rage remains and you decide to take_ it_. Take everything that should be yours."

He takes a deep breath and gives her a long look. "You do not seem to understand that I cannot stop this. This darkness has overcome me and I _like_ it. It makes me stronger it enhances my magic and I am feared. I am known. I am _powerful_."

Darcy shakes her head. "We'll win." She says, her voice dry and rough, "the good guys always win."

He _tsks-tsks _and shakes his head. "Oh Darcy, what makes you think you are one of the _good guys_? If you were truly a _good guy_, you would not have agreed to see me. You would not have kept on coming _back_ to see me. You would not have come here willingly with me and Darcy, let us not joke, you could have said no. You could have fought and your Avengers would have kept you with them, safe. But instead, you are here. With me."

"You said that I-" She cuts herself off and closes her eyes. _Oh. God_. He's _Loki_. He's the God of Mischief and Lies and this was all a trap. A vicious trap and she's the stupid little victim. "Why me? You owe me this answer."

"Because there is a darkness in you that I find…intoxicating."

* * *

><p><em>So, little history on Darcy. Some mind-fucking from Loki because everyone knows he'd do that. There will be more conversation between the two in the next chapter. Probably focusing on both. We'll talk more about this darkness and Darcy's fight with it. Darcy will ponder the revelation of her (unknowing) choice and see the ramifications. Implied smut will be in the next chapter. Maybe some soft lemon. I'm not sure. I'm nervous. <em>

_Hope everyone liked this chapter! Huge shout-out to my reviewers!: __**dhauren, EmCarstairs, Imperial Dragon, Celia, Blinded-Kit, scarletwitch0, Erestory, tic tac toe 03, BlindingFirefly**__. If I missed anyone I apologize profusely! _

_Thanks again!_

_Bex. _


	6. Chapter 6

_**Disclaimer**__: I own nothing. This saddens me greatly._

_**Pairing**__: Loki/Darcy, Thor/Jane, others mentioned_

_**Summary**__: She stares. He stares. It starts as a game. Neither was prepared for what would come of it. Sometimes, redemption comes in the form of words, softly spoken but always there. _

_**AN**__: Any mistakes are mine and mine alone and I apologize if they offend anyone!_

* * *

><p><strong>Redemption <strong>

**vi. **

* * *

><p>She wants to tell him that she doesn't have any darkness in her. She wants to tell him that she's a happy person. She wants to make him understand that she's <em>nothing<em> like him. Except, that's a lie, isn't it? Because a dark voice in the darkest part of her mind whispers that she's _exactly_ like him. If she weren't, he wouldn't want anything to do with her.

(Deep down, she knows that this is the reason why she kept on visiting him. She saw something in him that reminded her of herself. And isn't that just _terrifying?)_

Darcy is still on her side, facing him and the sun is beating down on them. She wants to curl into a ball and turn away from him. She knows that she should but she _can't_. She's frozen, immobile and he's staring back at her with those empty green eyes and all she wants to do is hold him. She wants to feel his skin underneath her fingertips and she wants to loose herself in the darkness. In _his_ darkness. With him. _Always with him_.

"Thor loves you." She says hoarsely. She won't give up easily. She'll fight whatever is clawing its way out of her and she will fight tooth and nail because that's what she is, she's a fighter. She's not a hero, she doesn't have any superpowers but she's a _fighter_, she's a _believer_ and sometimes she thinks that's better than being a superhero.

He breathes out of his mouth, "Thor is a fool." What he doesn't say is; _I know_. Darcy is sure that he knows how much Thor loves him. How much he defends him. How much he's willing to fight for him. How the thought of hurting him is so much more than Thor can bear. He has to know how Thor weeps for him and Thor doesn't weep for anyone or anything easily but he weeps for Loki.

"Your mother…your mother loves you, doesn't she?"

"My mother-Frigga-" he corrects himself and Darcy's heart clenches, "chose her side. She stands with my father and Thor."

"Has she always chosen Thor?"

She knows that she hasn't. She knows this because of the stories that Thor would tell her of when he and Loki were younger and Loki would get in trouble and how their mother always-_always_- defended Loki. How she would always hold him close and push her behind her, as if shielding him.

"I do not wish to speak about her."

"Your father-"

She can see him tense and sees his hands ball into fists. "Stop talking." He says and his voice is hard and it's cold.

"Is there anyone you can trust?" She asks desperately, "Isn't there anyone who you can think of that you trust and love?" She needs to know because this man-this God- could not have gone through eternity with no one by his side, could not have been so alone as he claims to be. Yet, she sees it in his eyes, she sees it in the set of his jaw and the way he never wavers in keeping eye contact with her, that _yes_, he has been alone for all this time.

"There is no one."

He's lying and keeping eye contact with her, Darcy _knows _(foolishly_ hopes)_ that he knows he's lying.

Because let's be honest, if he didn't trust her, if he didn't feel _something_ for her other than complete contempt, she would have been dead a long time ago. But she's not. She's alive and she's breathing and her heart is beating fast and she's with _him_.

_Always with him. _

* * *

><p>They're silent for a long time, Darcy still on her side and Loki sitting next to her, legs crossed and hands resting on his knees. The sky is still a light blue and the sun is still shining and it never goes down. The sun always shines here in their little Eden.<p>

"Tell me about your family." It isn't a question; it's more of a quiet demand.

Darcy lets a small smile grace her face and she tells him. She tells him about her childhood, her mother (her sweet, sweet mother who always smiled even on her deathbed), her father (her strong father who crumbled and fell when he lost the woman whom he loved the most), she tells him about her friends and her ex-boyfriends and she tells him _everything_ about her.

He probably already knows everything about her; he'd have to, wouldn't he? Darcy can't help but let it all spill out and it feels good. It feels good telling someone other than herself and her own little demons about her past, her present, what she had hoped for her future.

She tells him how she felt after her mother died. She tells him about her father's depression and her retreat into herself and how she felt alone and isolated and how she hated the world and she hated-_hated_- when people offered their condolences- because they didn't know her, they didn't know her mother, so what right did they have to feel _sorry _for them?

Her dad saw a therapist in Albuquerque but Darcy opted to let her bitterness fester and build up inside of her. She rebelled, of course she rebelled, there was alcohol and weed and boys, but she always came back home, always gave her dad a lopsided smile and he would stare at her and shake his head, sometimes with exasperation and sometimes with frustration but always with love.

She told him about how one day, her bitterness started to ebb away and how she slowly weaned herself off of weed and alcohol (she kept the boys, Albuquerque was home to quite a lot of good looking boys) and started talking to her father more. They started laughing more often and the hole that was left in their hearts didn't hurt so much anymore.

That's not to say it wasn't there. Her bitterness was hidden, not _gone_ and she felt it most when she was in Manhattan and working with the Avengers.

(She'll never admit to him that her bitterness doesn't hurt so much when she's with him. God, what does that say about herself?)

"Sometimes…sometimes, I just miss how everything used to be." She tells him, tears pooling in her eyes. "But I've got to hope, you know? Everyone has to have hope; otherwise, we'd all be empty. We'd all die."

"My hope," he says, his voice low, "has long since been gone."

Yeah, she knows. And she can just imagine, a little Loki (a teenage Loki, present Loki) standing on the sidelines, watching as everything passes him by, feeling something build inside of him, letting him know, always keeping him aware, that he's different.

The image of a sad, lonely Loki shakes her to her very core.

* * *

><p>She gets up and sits on her knees, shuffling closer to him. She can feel him tense, can see the wheels turning in his mind but her hands trail up his arms and she cradles his face. It seems like forever ago when she did this, when she leaned over the table and sealed her fate with a kiss (why is it always a kiss?)<p>

"What are you doing?" He breathes out.

"I don't know." She admits. She doesn't. All she knows is that there's a terrible ache in her body, in her _soul_. She closes the gap between them and she kisses him.

He's an expert kisser. He makes her body tingle and he makes her breath hitch (and for a man-God- who says that he's lost all hope, he makes her feel _everything_. He sets her body alight and she's lost. She's drowning in him, down…down…down she goes).

The sky crackles with energy and everything is shifting. Everything is changing and Darcy is too far-gone to pay any attention to it.

All she can pay attention to is the man above her (and whoa, when they get so horizontal, not that she's complaining). All she can pay attention to are his hands, so knowledgeable in their touching. She repays him in kind, it's the least she can do. Their relationship (can she even call it that?) is the tit-for-tat type; she won't ever let herself believe it can be anything more.

It seems like forever (everything seems like forever nowadays) but soon she's naked and he's naked (she isn't even ashamed) and then she's floating higher and higher and she breathes in deeply and moans and sighs and gasps and she stares. He stares. They both stare.

She is lost in his green eyes that burn brightly. She is lost in him.

She throws her head back and screams in complete abandon as a crack of thunder roars across the sky.

_Everything is shifting,_ she thinks, as she watches the man-God (_Loki_, _always Loki_) fall apart and piece himself (themselves) back together again. _Everything is changing._

* * *

><p>She is on her side, facing him and curled into his chest. They're still naked, both spent and unable to move. She's beginning to feel sore, but it's a good type of sore. A good type of pain.<p>

She feels whole. She feels full. She feels…_different_.

The sky is darkening, clouds of grey taking over, thunder rumbles and everything seems to be magnified.

His arms are loosely wrapped around her and he places a small tentative kiss on her shoulder. He brings his lips to her ear and with a ragged breath that makes him seem entirely like a man and not a God, he says, "it's time."

Darcy tilts her head and watches, as the grey sky quickly turns black. She closes her eyes.

"Will you stand with me." It's not a question. It's never questions with him. It's statements, always facts.

"Yes." She replies, her voice soft but the raging wind carries it and it echoes throughout the darkened garden.

Because Darcy Lewis will be damned before she becomes a disappointment to him. She doesn't think she could handle to see him hurt. She doesn't think she can stand to see him alone. She doesn't think she can stand to be yet another rejection in his eternal life.

(To be honest, Darcy doesn't think he can stand the thought either).

* * *

><p><em>Ohhh, buddy. So…what did you all think? My stomach is tied up in knots. Seriously. I'm so attached to these two it's not even funny. So, next chapter will be the end of the world as we know it. Kind of. Maybe. You'll see. I hope. It's so weird how nervous I am about this. Lol. Actually, just a head's up, the next chapter probably won't be posted until Monday or Tuesday of next week because I have got one 5,000 word essay and one 2,000 word essay that I need to get done for University. It sucks. I'm freaking out and this is my zen. So, here's my apology in advance. <em>

_Hope you enjoyed and a HUGE shout-out to my fantastic reviewers: __**dhauren, Imperial Dragon, Celia, LadyDraconian, EmCarstairs, Mae, Mintha, Blinded-Kit, i'm not Ulysses, **__and __**ShimmeringWater**__. If I forgot anyone, I am so sorry!_

_Thanks!_

_Bex. _


	7. Chapter 7

_**Disclaimer**__: I own nothing. This saddens me greatly._

_**Pairing**__: Loki/Darcy, Thor/Jane, others mentioned_

_**Summary**__: She stares. He stares. It starts as a game. Neither was prepared for what would come of it. Sometimes, redemption comes in the form of words, softly spoken but always there. _

_**AN**__: Any mistakes are mine and mine alone and I apologize if they offend anyone!_

* * *

><p><strong>Redemption <strong>

**vii. **

* * *

><p>"<em>Daddy, who is that man?"<em>

"_He's no one sweetie."_

_She scrunches her nose and looks over her father's shoulder at the man waving his arms and shouting. "But daddy he's saying we're all going to die."_

_Her father sets her down and kneels so that he's staring her in the eyes. Her eyes are the same as his, bright blue and forever curious, always taking in her surroundings. "He's being silly." Her father tells her. _

"_So, I'm going to die or am I going to live forever?" _

"_You will grow old and be surrounded by people who love you. Darce…don't…don't listen to people who say this kind of stuff, okay? It's going to take a lot to end the world and well, let's be honest, we're kind of lazy."_

_Darcy laughs, doesn't really understands and takes his hand as they walk down the street and away from the man waving his arms in the air and screaming. "I wanna live forever."_

"_That's no fun." Her father answers quickly, "what about your mom and me? We won't live forever and you'll stay young and watch the people you love grow old. That wouldn't be nice, would it?"_

_She frowns, tightens her hold around her father's hand and feels her heart constrict. No, she thinks, that wouldn't be fun. She doesn't want to live while everyone dies. That defeats the purpose of living doesn't it? "I don't think I wanna live forever."_

"_You've still got a long time ahead of you sweetheart." Her father says quietly. He gives her hand a quick squeeze and ruffles her hair. _

* * *

><p>Darcy lets out the breath she didn't know she was holding and opens her eyes. Her stomach still feels queasy and her legs are trembling (although she supposes that inter-galactic traveling does that). She's still clinging to Loki, his armor cool against her t-shirt and jeans. He's in his full armor (full warrior mode), face neutral and eyes cold (dark, bitter and <em>deadly cold<em>). She wants to go back. She wants to drag him back through space and time and she wants to stay in their own haunted version of Eden. She wants to cradle his body to hers and she wants to make his pain (her pain) go away.

Except it's too late. Because everything is ending.

She's back in Manhattan, or at least it used to be Manhattan. People are running around them, screaming. Buildings are collapsing, flames from fires heat the atmosphere and in the distance, she can hear sirens.

She idly wonders where the Avengers are. Thor must know that his brother (and by extension her) is back. And because Thor is a good guy, because Thor wants to save people, he would have told Coulson, Fury, Tony, Natasha, Clint, Steve, Bruce, Jane. _God. Jane_. Jane who is probably out of her mind with worry about Darcy. Jane who watched as a psychotic enemy held her best friend hostage and then took her away.

Darcy thinks Jane would be disappointed and ashamed in her if she found out that Darcy didn't exactly go unwillingly.

She's heard Loki talk of the end of the world (her world) but somehow she's never really imagined it. She always acknowledged that it would happen and that she would be there to see it, but she never actually pictured it. It doesn't matter anyways; she doesn't think that her imagination could come up with something as horrible, something as wretched as this.

There are people dying. There are people _already _dead and the screams resonate in her ears, as if in slow motion. She looks up as Loki untangles himself from her. He doesn't even look at her as he steps forward, head tilted to the sky as a sinister grin twists his face into something she doesn't recognize. No. _No_, this is not what she signed up for. She did not sign up to watch her friends, her family,_ die_.

They've been through too much. They've survived one attack; they can surely survive another one, can't they? This can't be the end. She doesn't _want_ it to be the end because she's not ready to die. She's not. And she doesn't care if that makes her selfish, she knows she is, but she's not _ready_. She'll help Loki in anyway she can because her soul, her heart, her entire being belongs to him, but not in this way. She won't watch as people die around her and as the place she's called home for the past year is destroyed.

She backs away from him, eyes wide and mouth open. _I can't do this_, she thinks, _I can't do this. Oh Loki, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry._

His head whips around to her and she freezes. He doesn't growl, he doesn't glare, he doesn't accuse her of lying (because she _hasn't_, she's never once lied to him, she will _never_ lie to him but she can't do this, she can't be part of this, because it's not _who she is_), instead, he just cocks his head to the side and stares at her. His green eyes boring into her blue ones.

"Darcy!" She hears a familiar voice yell and there are bullets flying overhead and arrows whizzing past her and towards Loki. Her scream catches in her throat as Loki's laugh echoes throughout the city, bouncing off of every collapsed building. He's out of view and all she can see is black. "Darcy!" Large rough hands hold her face and she looks up to see Clint. His brown eyes staring worriedly at her. "Are you okay? What are you doing here? What did he do to you?"

She blinks, she wants to answer him. She wants to plead and beg for them not to hurt him. He's twisted and angry but he's not completely evil (Darcy should know), he's just lost and a little desperate and he's consumed by darkness. (Darcy knows better than to try and save him, Loki doesn't need or want anyone to save him).

"Darcy!" Clint yells again, his voice desperate.

"I'm fine." She croaks, "Loki-"

He cuts her off and his eyes are hard as he passes her to another agent, "go with Danny. He'll take you to Jane." He's gone before she can say anything and she catches a glimpse of Loki, laughing manically as he fights them off one by one.

She catches a glimpse of Natasha and Steve as she's ushered away from the mess that is now Manhattan.

_I'm sorry Loki_, she weeps silently, _I'm so sorry._

(The agent, Danny, tells her that everything's going to be okay. That _she'll _be okay. That Loki will never hurt her again. Darcy wants to scream that nothing will ever be okay. She'll never be okay and Loki never hurt her. He never, _never_ hurt and he never will. She doesn't though. She just holds her head in her hands and weeps).

* * *

><p>She's ushered into an underground safe house. She's pretty sure that it's the Avengers hideout, since almost all of their equipment is there and it's huge, as in it goes on for miles. It's white and bright and it hurts her eyes.<p>

She doesn't have time to take everything in because as soon as she steps into the light, her breathing is constricted. "Jane." Darcy wheezes, "Jane, I need to breathe."

Jane is crying, her eyes are red and cheeks flushed. "It's horrible." She wails. "I was so scared and no one would tell me anything and you were _gone_ and I was so worried!"

"Oh Jane."

Jane wraps her arms around Darcy's neck and sobs. "I'm scared, Darcy. I'm so scared."

"Me too."

* * *

><p>She doesn't know how long she's waiting underground, but she knows it's not long. It doesn't look good from where she's standing. They keep the news on and there is footage of the carnage, there are photos and videos of the Avengers fighting Loki and Loki stands in the middle of it all, alone and fighting.<p>

"He just won't die." Danny says frustrated. "Why can't they just kill him?"

Something claws inside of Darcy. She doesn't want Loki to die. He can't die. He's immortal and Gods live forever, don't they?

"_You've still got a long time ahead of you sweetheart."_ She remembers her father telling her this all those years ago. God, how old was she? Six?

_Looks like time's run out, daddy._

It's not hard for her to sneak out. Everyone is so busy watching the world end that they don't notice her backing away slowly. They don't see her leaving the room. They don't see her climbing the ladder and out the back door of the safe house. No one even notices she's gone.

Until they see her on the news. Then everyone knows.

* * *

><p>It's worse the second time around. She pulls the collar of her shirt over her nose and mouth to cover the stench of death. She sees rotting corpses and burning bodies as she runs past them. She ignores pleas for help and she runs wildly to the place where she left Loki.<p>

It's sort of easy and all so very cliché. She follows the noise and makes her way through the dense fog of smoke and debris. She expertly jumps and dodges cracks and holes in the earth (and holy shit, this is it, this is the end of the world) until she hears them.

She hears Thor first. His voice booming and so fucking sad. He's begging and pleading Loki to stop "_just stop brother! Stop!"_ She hears Bruce (although he's large and green so does that even make him Bruce anymore?) roaring and feels the ground shake as he thunders towards Loki. She hears the bullets of Natasha's gun and the shifting metal of Tony's Iron Man suit.

But in the middle of it all, she hears Loki. His voice loud and his laugh even louder. He's losing himself even more. He's lost in his own darkness and the mere thought of that is so devastating to her. (He's drowning…down…down…down he goes).

She steps out from behind the building and walks forward. Her eyes focused on the figure in green. "Loki." She calls out, his head turns to see her and his eyes widen momentarily. "Loki…please."

"Darcy!" Clint and Steve are yelling her name. "Stay back."

"What are you doing here?" Clint yells at her.

"Are you stupid?" Natasha snaps.

Darcy is shaking by the time she gets close to Loki. She can feel his rage coming off of him in waves, but there is something else there, something foreign to him, something that he can't figure out. "Loki…_please_." It's all she can say. "Listen to me-"

"Fuck that." Clint snarls, "this is the perfect-"

"No!" Darcy shrieks, whipping around to face them, "do _not _touch him!" She turns to face Thor, her eyes pleading, "please, just…just don't."

"Loki…" She doesn't know what to say. She's at a loss for words. Should she tell him to stop? Should she tell him that he can stop? Should she sprout some bullshit about how its not too late to save himself and his soul? Should she pretend that she knows what it's like to kept in the dark for centuries? Should she lie to him and tell him that things will get better? No. She hasn't lied to him thus far and she won't lie to him now. The truth is (and Darcy fully acknowledges this) he probably wouldn't listen to her. He's too far-gone. He's too lost and Darcy wants to wail and cry and sob because she's failed.

It all makes so much sense to her now; it's not because of the darkness she had hidden in her. There are a dozen more people who've had a shittier life than her; half of them are standing behind her. It's not because of her internal struggle, no, it's because of how she always manages to come out on top. It's because she's a _fighter_ and it's because she's a _believer_ that he chose her. (She remembers him whispering to her that she will be his redemption).

"It wasn't my darkness that attracted you to me." She says, her voice loud as it carries with the wind, "it was my hope. It was my foolish hope in humanity and the core goodness of people." She chokes out a sob, "I'm sorry I fucked up. I'm sorry I couldn't…" _Couldn't what Darcy? Save him? Help him? Redeem him?_ "be what you wanted me to be."

He doesn't say anything. He just stares. At her. Directly at her. Not behind her. Not beside her but at her. Green meets blue and Darcy can barely even see straight. He does nothing and she knows that the Avengers are anxious, awaiting their (_his/her_) next move. He slowly outstretches a hand towards her.

"Don't." She can hear multiple voices behind her say.

Darcy doesn't listen. She's never listened well. Instead, she reaches out and takes his hand without hesitation. She's seen this moment before, she's seen it many times in her dreams she realizes.

So, this is why it doesn't come as a surprise to her that the moment their fingers are interlaced with each other so that she doesn't know where she ends and he begins, the world explodes in a kaleidoscope of colors.

* * *

><p><em>Oh…hey. So…what did you all think? I'm biting my nails and anxiously awaiting your responses. I'm so nervous, although it could quite possibly be a side effect from consuming waaaaaay too much caffeine (but it was tea and the naturally organic stuff, so that makes it healthy right?) I have no idea. <em>

_Anyways, thanks for your guys' support. It was very much appreciated! 5k and 2k essay are done! So excited. And I got a jump start on a couple projects so everything is going smoothly. As always, I look forward to your reviews as they are what makes my day/week/month/year/life. _

_Huge shout out to my reviewers who I adore!: __**dhauren, celia, LadyDraconian, hi, scarletwitch0, Erestory, BlindingFirely, EmCarstairs**__ and __**ShimmeringWater.**__ You guys are awesome and your reviews are so very appreciated! As always, if I missed anyone I am so very sorry!_

_Thanks!_

_**Bex**._

_**P.S**. Two more chapters to go and then the story is done. Kind of crazy, eh? _


	8. Chapter 8

_**Disclaimer**__: I own nothing. This saddens me greatly._

_**Pairing**__: Loki/Darcy, Thor/Jane, others mentioned_

_**Summary**__: She stares. He stares. It starts as a game. Neither was prepared for what would come of it. Sometimes, redemption comes in the form of words, softly spoken but always there. _

_**AN**__: Any mistakes are mine and mine alone and I apologize if they offend anyone!_

_Also, I recommend listening to Ed Sheeran _Give me Love_ and _Parting Glass_, while reading this chapter. It's what inspired me and I was listening to them on loop while writing. He's fantastic! _

* * *

><p><strong>Redemption <strong>

**viii. **

* * *

><p>When she opens her eyes, she is lying on her back. There is bright green grass and dandelions around her. The sun is shining brilliantly above her and the sky is a clear blue. She frowns as she stares at the sun. She doesn't remember the sun. She remembers Manhattan in its darkest hour. She remembers the screams and smell of blood burning its way through her senses. But sun, this type of sun that shines brightly, she hasn't seen this since…she gasps and jerks upright.<p>

She _recognizes_ this place. She _knows_ this place. She's loved, lost and cried here. She looks around, her eyes searching for him frantically. She can feel her heart beat faster, painfully thudding against her chest. She sees him a little further away. He's standing in front of a tree (it's that tree, _their_ tree, just like this place is their little Eden). She gets up and her body (her bones) creak in protest. She feels exhausted, she knows she looks like shit but she can't help it. She limps towards him (he's like a magnet, always pulling her to him).

She comes to a stop behind him and she watches him study the tree. "What's happening?" She asks him. She's so confused (she's always so confused).

He turns around to face her and Darcy almost stumbles back. He looks…_haunted_. He looks lost and Darcy wants to weep and she wants to hold him. In the end, she does neither. "You are hurt." He says, his voice quiet (and is that a little _remorse_ she hears in his voice?)

"It doesn't matter" she says, _people are dead and yet here _I_ am. Here _we_ are_. "Loki…what's happening?" _What are you going to do? What am I going to do?_

"You were right." He tells her and he lifts his face to stare at her. His eyes drink her in, as if trying to memorize her.

"Right about what?" Her body is seriously starting to hurt and she's starting to see little black spots in her vision. That's not good, right? It's probably not good at all.

"It is not your darkness. Although you_ do_ have some and it _is_ intoxicating. You were right in assuming it is your hope." He looks like he wants to laugh but instead he shakes his head. "You are a foolish little mortal who kept on staring at me from a mirror. I felt your sympathy, I felt your compassion. Very few things surprise me, but to know you, a mere slip of a girl associated with my brother and his merry band…so-called heroes, felt compelled to see me…to feel something_ other_ than disgust and hatred for me…you Darcy Lewis are an enigma."

"I'm not." She tries convincing him. _Oh God_. There is something, a feeling, an emotion clawing its way through her body. "I'm not an enigma. I'm very simple. I'm so simple. You can-" she breaks off, a sob erupting from her throat, "_we_ can be simple together."

"I am everything but simple. I am a monster."

"You're not." She is adamant in her belief of this. He's not a monster, not totally right? Because once upon a time, he was a little boy who loved his brother, adored his mother and idolized his father.

"Your body is battered and broken and I have done that. No one else, _I _did." There is that strange emotion in his eyes, one that he doesn't know how to handle, one that he doesn't know how to deal with. "I wanted you for myself. I wanted to keep you and _Odin help me_, I still do and I do not know why."

She knows why. Just like her body, her heart, her soul bound themselves to him, he is bound to her. He is in her blood. He is in her head. And _oh God, what have they done?_ She likes to think that somewhere in his self-proclaimed black heart, he may feel something other than contempt for her. That despite his words of 'foolish little mortal' and a 'mere slip of a girl' he holds admiration for her. Because _she came back for him._ How many people (Gods or not) have done that for him? How many have come back for him? Darcy knows the answer to that. He knows the answer to that too.

She pauses and doesn't even bother to wipe the tears from her eyes, "Loki…" she doesn't know what to say. She finds that she can't say anything. She knows that it doesn't matter what she says, he won't listen to her. He already has a plan. He always has a plan. And this time she's not involved in it. "I'll stay with you." She's desperate. There is a yearning, a longing in her for him. Just for him. _Always for him._

"Would you stay with me as I kill every single person you hold dear? Would you not say a word while you watch me kill your dear friend Jane, or your archer friend? Would you do nothing as I put your father, the_ one_ man you hold so much love and devotion for, out of his misery? Do _not _tell me that you will stay with me. You would not. And you know that I would do all this and more. I would take your pathetic civilization and tear it apart limb from limb."

She winces at his visuals and fear overcomes her. _Oh Jane. Oh Clint. Oh daddy_. Her precious father who is probably beside himself with grief.

"Why can't living be enough for you?" She asks. Her legs are trembling and she doesn't think that she's able to stand for much longer. The black spots in her vision are becoming larger, more pronounced.

"I am meant to rule. _You_ are meant to be ruled."

"And now?" She asks.

He steps further and his hands cradle her bruised face. She clutches at him as her body falls limp from the pain. "Now…" he whispers against her ear, he pulls away and stares at her, bright green meeting watery blue "now, you will redeem me."

She doesn't say anything else, finds that she can't because for the second time in that day, her entire world explodes.

* * *

><p>She can hear voices. They echo and they sound so far away. <em>Why are they so far away?<em> She sees white lights through half open eyes. She's pretty sure she sees Clint, his face serious and his mouth moving furiously. She's also pretty sure she sees Jane, straddling her hips (there is a dirty joke in there and if Darcy had the energy she would dig for it), eyes bloodshot and her small body shaking with sobs as she screams.

Darcy takes a closer look at Jane and sees her jeans and shirt covered in red. _Blood_, she thinks, _Jane is covered in blood_. There is a fear that grips her suddenly. _Is Jane hurt? Shouldn't she be in the safe house? Why isn't Jane in the safe house?_ Then Darcy realizes that it's _not _Jane's blood, that Jane _isn't_ hurt because it's _Darcy's_ body that is erupting with excruciating pain. _Oh,_ she thinks, _it's me. I'm bleeding. I'm dying_.

Her eyes flutter shut (there are no angels. There are no trumpets. There is no white light leading to the beyond. Her life doesn't flash before her eyes). All she sees is a figure, shrouded in darkness and the only thing she sees clearly is the color green. Bright green. _Loki._

Then everything fades to black.

* * *

><p>She wakes up to the smell of <em>Purell <em>and something strangely sterile (does sterile even have a smell?) Her head hurts. Her body hurts and it takes great effort to open her eyes. When she does, she's staring up at a cracked ceiling and she hears muffled voices.

She lets out a little cough and she instantly feels like bed dip. She turns her eyes to the side and sees Jane sitting next to her bed, smile wobbly and eyes tired. "Hi." She croaks out.

Jane hushes her gently and grasps her hand. Darcy shifts her legs, despite the pain that she feels and tries to make more room from Jane. "Hey," she says quietly, "you had us scared. How are you feeling? Need me to get you anything?"

_Some explanations would be nice,_ she thinks. "Water." _Loki_. (Since when do the two go hand-in-hand? Oh right, since she first met him). She takes small sips as Jane tilts the cup towards her.

"Look who's awake." A voice says from the doorway.

Clint is standing there with Steve next to him, their faces weary and tired. _Why is everyone so tired?_

"Where am I?" She asks.

"At the safe house." Clint answers, his voice strained, "you know, the one you were supposed to _stay_ in."

"Clint." Jane warns.

The safe-house?...oh. _Oh_. Right. The end of the world. Except well, they're still alive so the world couldn't have ended right?

"Darcy?" There is a thundering voice that Darcy would recognize anywhere and she sees Thor's massive frame come into view as he stands next to her bed. "Darcy! You are awake! This is great news!" He sounds happy enough but there is a hint of sadness in his voice, it's in the way he drawls out his syllables more so than usual.

Darcy frowns. _Loki. Where's Loki? What happened to Loki? _

Jane's face falls. Clint's hands ball into fists. Steve awkwardly shifts. Thor looks around the room, keeping eye contact with everything but her. Oh. Did she say that aloud? "Where's Loki?" There is an empty feeling inside of her and _oh God, please don't let it be true. Please, just give me one more chance. Please, just give_ him_ one more chance._

Jane grips her hand tighter and she shares a look with Thor, Clint and Steve. "Darcy…" she starts slowly, "Loki's dead."

Darcy shakes her head. The movement hurts and tears automatically fill her eyes. "No." There is certain horror in her voice. "No. He's a God. They live forever."

Jane shakes her head. "Sometimes…sometimes they don't."

"Thor…" Darcy's voice breaks.

Thor leans down and kisses Darcy on the forehead, "rest now, Lady Darcy. Everything shall be alright."

Except it won't be. Darcy knows this because she feels so fucking empty. So battered. So broken.

* * *

><p>She doesn't sleep. Instead, she just stares at the cracks in the ceiling and watches as her heart monitor beeps. She doesn't hear anyone in the halls. So Darcy sits upright, ignores her body's protest and shifts her legs over the edge of the bed. She takes a deep breath and rips off the wires. Her monitor goes blank and she winces as the stickers rip away from her skin. She rubs at the small red circles, grabs a robe slung across the chair and walks out of the room.<p>

She's a bit slower than before but she manages anyways. (She did it before, she can do it again). And she does. Obviously, Clint isn't there, neither is Steve since they would have stopped her and hauled her back to bed. She doesn't know who is there. She knows Jane isn't because Jane would be by her bedside. But Darcy doesn't care. She makes her way (slowly and painfully) up the ladder and through the back door of the safe house.

Manhattan is a mess. It is a _mess_. It is _chaos_. There is debris all over the streets, cars are abandoned and burned and even more, no one is outside. In the city that never sleeps, New York City is silent as death (the irony is not lost on her). She doesn't get very far before she collapses, her breathing coming out shallow. When she sits down on the curb, she looks left and right and sees the flowers at various places in the street. She sees the wreaths and cards and she sees _compassion_.

She lets out a sigh and it seems to echo up and down the empty street. She looks up and stares at the crescent moon that shines silver and it occurs to her that for the first time since coming to New York, she can actually see the _stars_. (It's a horrible thought but it's the first one that she can think of).

So, she laughs and it's a little manic, a little desperate and it _hurts_. Pain radiates through her body as she continues to laugh until she bends forward holding her sides and starts to cry.

Because she_ knows_ that somewhere beyond the stars and the moon and space and time, somewhere between their own twisted little version of Eden and this horrible reality she now calls life, is her heart.

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><p><em>FEAR NOT! I have something planned. Something that you all probably won't like, but it's how I always saw it ending and I'm both anxious and nervous to see how you'll respond! In other news ...one more chapter. One more chapter. Wow. Can't believe it's almost done. And this really is kind of dark, isn't it? I'm normally not that dark of a person, at least I don't think I am, but I am glad that you guys are enjoying it! Your responses to last chapter are love. Pure and complete love. <em>

_So, to my awesome reviewers: __**Celia, Miravisu, HowlynMad, mae, ShimmeringWater, dhauren, LadyDraconian, BlindingFirefly, stafadox, EmCarstairs**__. If I forgot anyone I apologize profusely! Thanks again!_

_Hope you enjoy!_

_**Bex. **_


	9. Chapter 9

_**Disclaimer**__: I own nothing. This saddens me greatly._

_**Pairing**__: Loki/Darcy, Thor/Jane, others mentioned_

_**Summary**__: She stares. He stares. It starts as a game. Neither was prepared for what would come of it. Sometimes, redemption comes in the form of words, softly spoken but always there. _

_**AN**__: Any mistakes are mine and mine alone and I apologize if they offend anyone!_

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><p><strong>Redemption <strong>

**ix. **

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><p>She is on bed rest and always has an escort with her. It's usually Jane but at odd times Steve or Clint will sit next to her. Jane will talk about work and Thor. Steve will tell her stories and try to make her laugh. Clint will sit on the chair next to her bed and brood, hands fisted and eyes boring into her.<p>

(None of them mention Loki. None of them breathe his name even when she begs and pleads and cries for answers).

On her third week of bed rest, she hears the door creak open and she looks up, ready to fling an insult and tell them to _get the fuck out_, when her voice gets caught in her throat. Jane is there, hands wrought together and a small smile on her face. "Hey, look who we found just wandering Manhattan." It's Jane's version of a joke. It's not a funny one, since it's only recently the people of New York have set aside their grief and are trying to rebuild their once vibrant home (it's same across the world, so much death, so much destruction, so much _pain_).

But Darcy laughs anyways. It's the first time she shows any type of emotion besides sadness. The man who steps into the room is tall, with fading bruises evident on his body. His eyes a bright blue and a small smile flits across his face and his eyes relax and they're full of love, adoration and utter relief. "Oh, Darcy."

"_Daddy! I've got a boo-boo!"_

"_Mwah." He kisses her bandaged knee and smiles at her, "better?"_

"_I can't feel any pain!" She throws her small arms around his neck. "Love you daddy."_

Her breath catches, _oh what I would give to go back in time_, Darcy thinks. She gives him a bright smile, despite her aching body and heart (_"__Would you do nothing as I put your father, the__ one__ man you hold so much love and devotion for, out of his misery?"_ No. No, she wouldn't. Darcy would do a lot for Loki, but that is not one of them) "hi daddy."

Her dad makes his way into the room and sits on the edge of her bed. She gets up with his help and lets her legs dangle from the edge. She swings them back and forth (just like when she was a kid) and she leans her head against her father's shoulder. He wraps an arm around her and holds her tightly. "I've missed you so much." He breathes.

"I love you." She says quietly.

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><p><em>Three months later<em>

Her father decides to stay in New York with her. There's nothing left for him in Albuquerque. It's sad for her to think that there's nothing left for him (them) anywhere. She tells him everything (because she's always told him everything).

The city is slowly but surely being rebuilt. It's still too soon, but plans are in the making and it's going to take a long time and she's sure that some wounds will never heal, but all that matters is that they're trying. They're persevering and that's all she really wants.

Sometimes, especially when its cold, her body will hurt and she'll long for sun-filled days in Eden. But most days she keeps herself busy with work (Jane convinced Coulson and Fury to let her back, because let's be honest, Darcy knows too much). She'll talk with Jane and Steve and Clint. She'll even talk to Natasha and Tony when she sees them and she finds that she's slowly but surely getting back to the way she was before. She finds sarcasm comes along easily and her quips are being appreciated (mostly by Tony who actually gets her twisted sense of humor).

Most of the time though, she can't sleep, so she'll stay up and go through every conversation, every stare, every kiss shared with Loki and try to figure out where it all went wrong. (_It was always wrong_, she thinks to herself and she supposes that's why they fit so well, why they bound to each other so eagerly).

She doesn't see Thor often and when she does, he stares at her for long periods of time. Eyes imploring her to listen. He doesn't say anything to her. No one lets him within five feet of her without someone next to him. She wants to tell them that it's okay. Out of everyone, Darcy would love to talk with Thor. She wants to listen as he tells her stories of a little boy with black hair who loved his brother, adored his mother and idolized his father.

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><p>She overhears an argument that she's pretty sure she's not meant to hear.<p>

"You're making a mistake." The voice is male and angry. She recognizes it instantly. _Clint._

"How is this a mistake?" Thor's rumbling voice flows past the walls and door. "She deserves to know. She_ must_ know."

"He almost _killed_ her. He _did_ kill a shit ton of other people. She doesn't have to know anything regarding him." Clint snaps back.

Darcy frowns.

There is a soft female voice (Jane) that says, "Clint, you've seen her and you've seen him. I think it's time."

"This is bullshit."

"No." Thor disagrees. "This should have been done months ago."

They stop talking and Darcy backs away from the door. It opens and Clint is the first one out. He takes a glance at her, shakes his head and stalks away from her. She's confused (she's always so confused). Jane steps out next, a little shocked to see Darcy so close but she smiles and Darcy knows that it doesn't reach her eyes. Jane's eyes hold a bit of hesitancy but she puts her arm on Darcy's shoulder and kisses her temple. Then she leaves in the same direction Clint disappeared to, passing by Thor and squeezing his arm in support (love, adoration, complete faith in him, is that _what love is?_)

Thor looks at her and he looks so tired, so weary, so worn. "Follow me, Lady Darcy."

She says nothing but follows him.

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><p>She walks beside Thor as they walk through various tunnels and elevators and stairs and she's pretty sure that they're well beyond six feet underground when walk through one door and stop at the beginning of a long hallway. It's well lit and Darcy can see metallic walls, glinting brightly against the light.<p>

There's something else in the hallway. A different atmosphere than the rest. She shivers and pulls her sweater closer to her body. She looks at Thor with questioning eyes and he takes a deep breath and motions her to follow him. She does and the further down the hall she walks the more she can feel her stomach turn to knots. The closer she gets to the end of the hallway, the more static is in the air, some type of energy (it's familiar, _why is it so familiar?_) wraps around her. Enveloping her.

"I must go in with you." Thor says, his voice deep. "You understand why I must go in with you, yes?"

"Thor?" She asks, her voice shaking. There is a feeling in her gut, there is a feeling that is being ignited in her soul, _oh God, please, please, please, let it be true._

Thor opens the door and lets her walk in first. The first thing she sees are bare walls and nothing in the room but a lone man (God) on the floor. Her heart leaps in her throat. She knows him. She recognizes him. She _loves_ him. God help her, _she loves him_.

She kneels in front of him and he looks so…horrible. He's pale and sweaty but his eyes are still aware, still bright green and still staring at her. She turns to look at Thor, her mouth closing and opening, words failing her.

"I don't understand." Is what tumbles out of her mouth.

"Of course you do not." Loki says, his voice is shaky but confident, "because you are just a mere mortal." And she laughs because she can hear something _other _than complete contempt in his words.

She cradles his face in her hands and leans her forehead against his. "You're here. You're _alive_." (There are so many questions running through her mind and there is a sense of betrayal that is rising in her, but she pushes them all away because here's _here_ and he's _alive_).

"This is his punishment." Thor explains quietly, his voice full of anguish. "This room…it absorbs his powers. It makes him weak. It is…for a God…it is torture."

"It makes me human." Loki tells her bluntly.

She bites her lip and cocks her head to the side, "yeah, how do you like us now?" She pushes loose strands of his hair away from his face tenderly. "How long?" She asks.

"Until he is repentant." Thor tells her.

Darcy turns and stares at him, blue eyes locking with bright green and she leans closer until they're sharing the same air space (he breathes in, she breathes out. It's a cycle with them).

"You will redeem me." He says to her quietly. It isn't a question, it's never a question with him. It's always a quiet demand.

She nods, "okay."

She seals the deal (her fate, her future, her heart, her soul, her _free will_, whatever) with a kiss that burns her body from the inside out.

She breaks away from him and sits next to him as Thor continues to stand. Loki's chained to the wall (why is he always chained?) but his hands are by his side and Darcy reaches down to hold his hand, interlacing her fingers with his, so she doesn't know where she ends and he begins. He turns his face and stares at her.

(The world doesn't explode. Instead, as blue meets green and they continue to stare while Thor continues to talk. And they find that they are starting to heal. Together).

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><p><em>So, this is how I've always pictured it ending. Actually, it was this final scene that sort of inspired this story because it bit me in the ass one night at three in the morning. Thanks inspiration, you're a doozy! lol But...there. It's done. Wow. I guess it's a love story but not a typical love story because well, can Loki love? Yes, I think he can but I just think that he loves a little differently. What did you all think? Good or bad or "you should never write again!" Your reviews mean a lot to me!<em>

_Speaking of, I want to give a **HUGE SHOUT OUT** to my reviewers who have reviewed and continued to give me so much support: __**dhauren, Chinagirl18, celia, scarletwitch0, EmCarstairs, Blinded-Kit, Miravisu **__and __**ShimmeringWater**__. Seriously, your guys' support means the world to me and I adore all of you. You have no idea what your kind words and support helped me through and know that I write with all of you in mind. This being said, a HUGE THANK-YOU to everyone who read, alerted, subscribed and much more to this story. To know that you all enjoyed it is so very fulfilling to me. **If I forgot anyone, I apologize profusely!**_

_Thanks again and I hope you enjoyed the story as much as I enjoyed writing it!_

_Much love, _

_**Bex. **_


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